Diamonds Made of Glass

"Pan's Labyrinth" by Guillermo del Toro is my absolute favorite movie. I got it for my 14th birthday and fell completely in love with it's combination of darkness and innocence, and how every time I watch it I find something new; some detail that connects things together in a whole new way. I find relief in it, hope, an escape. It can be interpreted in many ways. I like to think that I still have a spark of that open-minded curiosity and imagination that a child has just naturally and not because they've been taught to be that way. I do know the world is cruel, so why let all of me give in to that?

Drained, I stand beneath

I made a Vegan Strawberry and Vanilla cake for my Mom's 42nd birthday. I tried to veganize the way my Grandma aaaalways used to make cakes. I think it turned out pretty good.

I post abouuuut... 3-4 times a week average. A day off is always a good day to blog. But also, after a super busy and irritating day it's a good way to clear your mind.

I love reading recipes and DIY. But also, I love reading poetry and fiction. There's such a variety of writers out there blogs are a good way of seeing a bit of each.

Things I can look forward to, like a story posted in parts or some weekly DIY post. Different, weird, odd, dark... anything "shiny" that catches my eye will keep me coming back. A fave is one with good posts and a good layout. Even though I care most about the writing, the visuals are part of the package =)

Don't be fooled by

the disciplined afterglow,

Inside, 

The shockwaves still roam,

Growing out of my heart

Like slime,

A carrier cell, planted 

Deep inside the tendrils of my memory,

Organs made of insects,

The little devils.

They won't even talk to me anymore,

Mad at me, cursing in tongues,

Speaking of weapons, 

Making me jealous.

And I cannot cry.

I cannot fucking cry,

My mind is a whirlpool,

Spinning yet calm,

Colorless, dull---

Painless.

It hurts, too many of them

Too many creatures skipping through my veins

Playing fucking hopscotch.

Fiction.

Let it be fiction.

Fiction coursing through me,

Not a memory or a recognition but something fake,

Artificial coloring on an artificial moment,

Frogs, castles, ponies, but no 

Not the pliers,

Not the razor,

Not the pills,

Not the towel,

Not the annoying ambulance driver.

Not her.

Definitely not her.

Just trying to get into your head.

I miss you already.

I'm sorry I wasn't enough.

I hope they help you; it is all I want from life today.

I've been born and raised in Finland, so even though some American and British shows made their way into our televisions and so a part of my childhood, it is some sort of Finnish tradition that the Moomins were a major part of mine. I still watch them, and want my little brother (soon two years old) to start watching them because it is such a big part of our culture.

The Moomin Family

"The Moomins (Swedish: Mumintroll, Finnish: Muumi) are the central characters in a series of books and a comic strip by Swedish-Finn illustrator and writer Tove Jansson, originally published in Swedish by Schildts^[2] in Finland. They are a family of trolls who are white and roundish, with large snouts that make them resemble hippopotamuses. The carefree and adventurous family live in their house in Moominvalley, in the forests of Finland, though in the past their temporary residences have included a lighthouse and a theatre. They have many adventures along with their various friends.

In all, nine books were released in the series, with five picture books and a comic strip being released between 1945 and 1993.

The Moomins have since been the basis for numerous television series, films and even a theme park called Moomin World in Naantali, Finland." ----- READ MORE HERE

 I think the biggest impact that came from watching the show and reading the books and the comic strips was that it taught me how very different people are and that even though they are, they're just as special. The franchise has actually been banned in some countries because of the rather unorthodox family combo.

"Little My (Swedish: Lilla My - literally: "little mu") is a character in the Moomin series of books by Tove Jansson. She first appears in the fourth book, The Exploits of Moominpappa (1950). She is a small, determined and fiercely independent Mymble. When she wants something done, she does it straight away. She is very aggressive, mischievous to a fault and totally disrespectful, but can be a good friend when she wants to. She has a brash personality. She is the Mymble's Daughter's younger sister. She is eventually adopted by the Moomin family.

The name Little My originated from the twelfth letter of the Greek alphabet: μ (Mu) - transliterated as my and pronounced [my] in Swedish. In the metric system, lowercase mu μ, meaning "one-millionth", represents the prefix "micro-", from the Greek μικρός (mikrós), meaning "small".

The popularity of the character has led to the personal name My being borne by more than 3000 women and girls in Sweden."

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"TV is something that people either watch a lot of or have definite feelings about. This week, we want you to think about tv show from your past. Maybe you watched it, maybe you didn't and it was just something that everyone else talked about.

What feelings does the show evoke? What memories does it trigger?

Keep it to 600 words and come back to link up on Tuesday, July 5th."

I was born this way, baby

Going to Helsinki Pride 2011 today <3

Hello again blogging world. I haven't visited you that much this week, I apologize. It was the last day of work for me today. No more scanning, no more papercuts (or cuts from old, broken staples) or aching knuckles or fingers... Heaven. 

I work for the future, always. So that's pretty much what kept me going. Everything is for something. For example, I was working to get money for some plane tickets over to North Carolina to stay at my girlfriend's place. There are many motivational concepts within that one, I tell you...

I'm thinking my hearing's gotten a bit dodgy since I've been listening to music all the time while scanning. Also, my feet are dead and they look like the feet of a dead person. I'm serious. I need to do something about that... Plus my fingers and knuckles are aching so badly it is so very surreal because I never ever have such a bad pain in such small places. I've literally dipped my feet (or should I say fingers?) into the working world. The adult world as my mother calls it. Ha! Since when wasn't I part of that one? If not then let's call this my entering to it then. I'm quite over the moon about finally getting those tickets to go see my babydoll <3

Due to the fucked-up way this year's courses were planned for my dance school I won't be able to do my graduation project the way I wanted to, as a group production. So I'll have to go solo. I'm not actually that sad about it, at least I can go by what I can do. I want to ace it, since it can open a lot of doors to universities. I've grown fond of Breathe In, Breathe Out by Mat Kearney for the music. But a part of me is thinking it should be to something by Lady Gaga. Or 30 Seconds To Mars. Cannot decide. HELP.

I would love to do a choreography to Edge of Glory and dance in heels but... one can always dream. Can't do major pirouettes or jumps and wouldn't that be weird if I took them off for a while and then put them back on...

Get instructions to make some  here

My writing's been slow due to work. And because of that I missed a deadline on the Indie Ink Writing Challenge and ended up being kicked out, sadly. I loved being there but I understand that making exceptions or asking for them would just mix things up and make things too complicated. I can always write for the archive, so I'm trying to stay positive.

I've been making some friendship bracelets. It's very therapeutic! And it helps with my aching fingers, it's weird. I have yet to do any of the crafts I'd planned up for summer, I suppose I'll do them when I get back home --- haven't been home for a month now. I have a dance course next week. Modern <3 And then I'm off home.

I'm off to eat something and then I'm going to bed... and it's not even 9 PM. Yes, I'm tired. And I'm going to go snuggle with my cute baby brother. The best medicine to sadness <3 That boy is full of love and sunshine.